Lessons About Travelling

This weeks news stories have been awash with stories of travelling.  Whether it be people travelling, neutrino’s travelling or a satellite travelling towards earth.  It’s been a wonderfully refreshing look at the stupidity of mankind.

Let’s start with the people travellers.  In yet another example of the stupidity of political correctness and the general stupidity of the human race the story of Dale Farm has been dominating the headlines in the UK.  It relates to a group of gypsies who have settled on a piece of land and want to stay there.  However the local government wants to evict them as this land belongs to someone else.  In a nutshell they are illegally squatting on land which doesn’t belong them, which by all accounts is against the law.  BBC is full of interviews with these squatters explaining that they are ‘travellers'(their preferred name for themselves) and they will never give up their way of life.  Newspapers are full of headlines such as  ‘save the travellers homes.’ and no one sees the insanity of their own statements. The day they settled at Dale Farm they ceased to be travellers and they became squatters.  To be a traveller you need to fucking travel.  Staying in one place is not travelling.  It’s not moving.

The scientific world was stunned to discover that Einstein was wrong.  After spending billions of pounds designing super extravagant overly complicated toys scientists have found something which travels faster than the speed of light.  The perfectly named sounds a bit like some monsters in Super Mario, Neutrino’s.  First of all I find it incredible the brightest minds in sciences are surprised when a 100-year-old theory is proved incorrect.  As scientists you would expect that they expect new discoveries to be made all the time.  The number of  influential scientists who have been proved wrong over time is extensive.  As science evolves, new techniques are discovered, new equipment is designed, the scientific truth is ever-changing.  The most incredible thing about these smug arrogant scientists who are on our tv screens taking discreet pleasure in using the words wrong and Einstein in the same sentence is their grasp of history.  One reason why Einstein may not have realised that there is something that travels faster than the speed of light is the fact that the Neutrino was discovered in 1959.  Where as Einstein died in 1955.  So excuse me for suggesting that this fact is crucial.  The second thing I would like to point out in Einstein’s defence is that the Theory of Relativity is…. well….. a fucking theory for God’s sake.

I will close with a few musings on the satellite which crash landed somewhere.  I say somewhere as no one knows where on earth(great choice of expression) that satellite landed.  That’s right for all the money, gadgets and brilliant minds NASA employs they could not track an enormous satellite as it hurtled towards the earth.  Its reassuring to know that nothing untoward could have happened.  That there was 0 chance of anyone losing their life.  Seriously what chance would we have if Aliens ever invaded.  Fifty percent of humanity would be arguing over whether we should call them aliens, travellers or space travellers.  Scientists would be morris dancing with delight due to the fact that the existence of aliens would prove that a large number of famous scientists were completely wrong while NASA will tell us that they are coming, they just wouldn’t know where and when.  Seriously we are fucked.  If this is the best the human race has to offer, then we belong in the special olympics.

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