Summer Holidays

I’ve been quieter than a mouse trying to suppress a fart as it sneaks past a sleeping cat.  There are a myriad of uninteresting reasons for that and strangely none of them involve a potato.  Alas I am the bearer of some tidings.

For all of you buggers that read eBooks of an electronic variety and are off to lounge around the pool for a week or two sipping cocktails with the sole intention of coming back the colour of the average Essex girl in mid November, you can find practically my entire back catalogue for free throughout July right here on Smashwords.  That’s the Non-stop Dancer, PiSlamistan, Mia, All Hallows’ Eve, Existence Is Futile and the Story of Albert Ross absolutely free to your eReaders.  If you don’t do eBooks but know somebody who does share this good news.  And if you or anyone you know happens to give them a try, please don’t forget to leave a review somewhere or God will quite probably kill a kitten.

In other news, rather unlike me, I have actually been writing.  Book number three is well underway and features high commerce, gratuitous sex and mildly depressed fruit.  It is quite obviously somewhat a niche market, however, I believe that if the world has a place for dinosaur erotica, I’m going to be just fine.  In the meantime, be nice to each other and read books.

The Non-stop Dancer is available

Ladies and Gentlemen, and all of you that are bored as you shuttle between work and polling stations, I have some good news, I can offer you something to read.

To commemorate the wonderful day in which the nation of Great Britain gets to choose between a turd sandwich, a turd roll, a turd panini and a turd baguette, I have decided to publish a #Brexit themed short story entitled ‘The Non-stop Dancer’.

For those of you that do eBooks you can get it here from #Smashwords

For those of that think you are man enough to read it in one go(it takes around 26 minutes) you can read it here on #Medium

And for those of that don’t eBook and would like to read it in digestible chunks, you can read it here on #Wattpad

All that’s left for me to say is go forth and read it.  If you like it, share it.  And if you love it, or hate it, you let me know what you think by leaving a review right here on #Goodreads

Enjoy

 

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