Freebies and Fourbies

It’s been a while since I have posted an update on my literary babies and the odd projects that I am somehow involved in so I thought I should share some news.

On Thursday the 26th of November, to commemorate my entry into middle-life misery, Amazon will be giving away the kindle version of ‘Mourning Morning’ absolutely free.  That’s right, you can read my book without the fear of even a penny going to me.  So do it, and enjoy the fact that I am a starving, struggling, writer that lives under a bridge with a hobo called Johnny Wanxard.

To further commemorate another year survived, the price of the paperback edition of ‘Mourning Morning’ has been slashed harder than Freddy Kruger’s underwear that time he had public lice.  You can order it by clicking here.

Nook readers can now get ‘Mia’ for free, directly from the Barnes and Noble store.  You can find it right here.

For those of you in Poland.  On Saturday the 28th of November you can go and see my new band play their first live concert at the Europejskie Targi Muzyczne in Warsaw.  You, or should I say, Yu, can find all the details right here.

I rarely use this blog as a platform to ask for help, however, for once I can only to try to use it for the power of good.  In my hometown of Harlow, something terrible is happening.  The single live music venue is being closed down and it is awful news.  ‘The Square’ in Harlow, was the first place that ever gave a stage to an original song by me. The song in question was Wet Dream performed by the magnificent Dwarf Antidote. Since then a billion miles have passed, I have swapped writing angry teenage punk for uplifting Polish electro and the very venue that offered a forum for many others like me is closing down and it utterly depresses me. ‘The Square’, for most of that have inhabited the place at some point in our lives, is a sanctuary, a safe place away from alcohol-fuelled testosterone inspired pissing competitions found in nightclubs in so many towns. It has always been a place where you could be yourself, no matter how ridiculous that self is, and that for one is worth celebrating. Now we have a chance to say thank you. ‘The Square’ is in the running to be voted ‘Britain’s Best Small Venue’ by NME magazine.  Anybody can vote, regardless of location, and you can do so by clicking here.  Go on, it will only take a minute and it may well save a special place for so many people.

And if my pleas have fallen off death ears, make yourself a coffee, or pour a beer, or whatever it is you people do and watch this video which explains precisely why you should #SaveTheSquare

It’s a Kind of Maciek

Image.  We curate it, we preserve it, we defend it and we idealize it.  It is the centrifugal force that defines us, at least we think it does.  We constantly present a variation of our image every single day.  In the office we may wish to be seen as a diligent worker bee, on a Friday night a party animal, on a Sunday morning devoutly religious or not as the case may be.  Take a moment for yourself and count how many images you possess, and then ask yourself if you are insane.

Mankind is so obsessed by image that it permeates through every single thing we do.  We have created statues, portraits, poems, photos, songs, books, plays and films all in the name of presenting an image.  A writer or an artist is able to embellish that image in order to better sell it to their audience.  A photographer isn’t.

It is true to say that in the 21st century we are all photographers.  We spend much of our lives trying to capture experiences through tiny camera lenses on mobile phones instead of experiencing them.  Then we add filters to further distort the experience that we were trying to capture in order to make it better.  The oft result is that we end up with a collection of kaleidoscopic pictures which we store somewhere online and never look at again.

There is another kind of photographer.  That is a person that tries to coordinate an image inside their own head with the equipment they have in front of them.  It is more than trying to capture a moment, it is the evocation of emotion from within the viewer.  It must make you feel something, otherwise it is little more than wallpaper.

I would like to introduce you to a photographer by the name of Maciek Wojciechowski. Maciek’s career is gradually taking off and recently has been focusing on nudes.  You can find some wonderful examples at  His work has been exhibited internationally and he is available for commissions.  Also he took this…


Maciek also took this.  I liked it so much that I bought a print.  You can too.  Click on the photo to learn more.


Now go forth and check out his work and try to cut your own number of images down to one.  ‘Alisa’ by Maciek Wojciechowski in on exhibit at the Dray Walk Gallery on Brick Lane, London until the 20th of October.  If you live in the city, you should definitely check it out.

A Gaggle of Cun….

It seems that barely a week is able to pass by without an underclass of social media users sharing images of something disgusting.  This week’s image in question, which incidentally, I am not going to share, is of a dead Syrian child lying on a beach.  It is an image so repugnant in its very idea, that there is absolutely no need for anyone to ever share it.  Unless they are morally obtuse, self-absorbed, shitbergs.

This social media underclass of keyboard warriors and online campaigners believe that they are making a difference.  In my own encounters with these feckless morons the most common defence that I have encountered is that they are, in fact, ‘raising awareness’.  In this particular case they might be right.  There might be someone, probably called George, that lives in a closet, has an allergy to news, and has only one friend in the entire universe responsible for shaping their world view.  Them.  In such cases it is indeed true they are raising awareness, raising awareness that George should likely try living a life in the real world.  However, putting George to one side for a moment, I cannot help but wonder what it is precisely that they are raising awareness of?  Death?  Their penchant for collecting pictures of dead children?  The fact that life is unfair?  That war is fatal?

The fact is, these click-baited mindless morons gain a sense of usefulness and righteousness from their actions.  They are honestly that stupid that they believe with a genuine conviction that sharing distressing images does something positive for the causes which they care about.  That all they are required to do is click one button, or touch one screen and life will become inordinately better.  It is self-delusion of a scale that in past centuries would have landed them inside mental asylums, and yet, today, is the true epoch of our modern age.

The saddest thing of all is that this sharing, caring, generation of internet zombies are, deep down, exactly the same as George.  They are all blithely unaware of the universe which lives outside of their own doorsteps.  It is as if the genius of Zuckerberg is that he has convinced us that we are regal in our kingdoms.  That we Gods of the touchscreens are able to shape the perceptions of others through tacit use of shock and awe.  That humanity is a community interconnected by screens.  It is not.  It is a living, breathing dying gaggle of gene machines.  Humanity cannot be saved by the power of want.  The force of intention does not put food in the bellies of refugees.  The awe of image cannot stop wars.  The divine power of the share button cannot stop people dying, no matter how many times you share a photograph of a dead child on a beach.

On the Topic of #Hejty

The internet is a wondrous thing. Not only has it completely transformed communication but it has managed to shrink geographical proximity to irrelevance. Alas, like all good things it doesn’t come without a health warning.  It takes the human mind approximately 7 seconds to make a judgement or a decision and a further 11.7 seconds to write something unpleasant or abusive.

The strangest thing is that many people feel as if the anonymity offered by the Internet protects them from the human rules that govern our interactions. It doesn’t. All a predilection to attacking people online under the cover of anonymity proves is that you, in fact, are a massive arse.

The fact is that science has proven that it takes a great deal more time to write something unpleasant than to make a judgement based on information. This means that the unpleasant vitriol spewed by many online has nothing to do with human emotion and everything to do with callousness.

There are some things in life that are deserving of our wrath.  Not the person whose perspective or sexuality differs from yours. Nor the person that looks differently.  But for those actions that cause misery and suffering for the assorted creatures that are stuck on our floating rock.

A New Era Has Begun

Welcome, witam, wilkommen, velkommen, welkom, bienvenue, bem-vindo and hello.  As you can see, I have had the decorators in(no sniggering at the back) and redesigned my website.  I sincerely hope you like it and find it much easier to find your way around.  If not, then you really shouldn’t be on the internet.  Or allowed to go outside.  Or to reproduce.

This site represents what I hope will be a significant change.  In the past few months I have learned a great deal about the Henry Tomlinson which lives inside all of us.  I hope to share some of those thoughts with you in the coming weeks.

Alas, today I do not want to talk about tomorrow. I want to talk about today.  For those of you that may have missed it, I, Scott Andrews, am in a Spandau Synthpop band.  It is a story so odd and yet somehow majestic that I will likely save it for a book one day.  Almost a month ago, our first music video was released.  In that time it has clocked over 77,000 views on YouTube.  And, guess what, you lucky bastards can see it below.  Until next time…



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